Happiness

So, as explained extensively in my last post, I feel bit different since returning from Idaho. One of ways this has been manifesting is in my general attitude on life. I may not sound much different to some, but inside I feel much more content with life. Life just seems better, more do-able. Maybe it is a result of all the other things which I realised while I was out West, or maybe it is a separate product of the trip, but I just plain feel better. Things which used to bother me a lot have much less of an effect on me. I also used to be very self-conscious, often thinking I was a bother to others or I had to be funny or useful to prove myself to those around me. My time in Idaho turned out to be a big self-esteem booster. Now, I understand more of my value as a person and son of God.

To be honest, I cannot recall when I have been so optimistic about life. Perhaps this is a result of dealing with a suicide while I was in Idaho; perhaps it was making the decision to move there and following through with it; perhaps it stems from all the reading I have been doing; perhaps it is through becoming reconnected to my lifelong dreams. Whatever the cause, I feel much more capable to succeed in life, and the little things which normally get in the way are unable to bring me down.

Thank You, God, for whatever You have done in me.

Peace.

Treasure Hunt!

So, this was an interesting weekend.

First, I have more of an answer to the college ideas I was having earlier this week. I will probably not be pursuing more education just yet, probably not for at least a year. As I researched the colleges I was looking at and tuition fees, I realised I would have to pay a TON more as a non-resident...a status I will not be able to change until I've lived in Colorado for a year. Ick. Even if I was to take community college courses in Colorado Springs instead of going straight to Durango for college, it would still cost me over double the normal cost for residents.

My mom, in her wisdom, also reminded me that after people have finished their first degree and are working full-time jobs (that would be me now...), they have to just take classes when they can and sacrifice their social time after work for study time. I was looking at the situation like I could just go back to school somewhere...but I wouldn't be able to get nearly as much financial aid, and if I'm a full-time student, I just won't be able to pay for college without help or a good job. I still have a lot of growing up to do.

Second, today my roommate Justin took me to something called a "treasure hunt" around MSU campus. Last week, he met a bunch of new people who go to a place called "The Furnace," a little prayer room in a basement on Grand River across from MSU which is dedicated to praying for and evangelising campus, particularly through bringing together the campus ministries and giving them one roof to meet under. Little place with a big mission...I like it.

Anyway, these people are CRAZY about Jesus in a way I haven't seen since I was in Colorado. We met in the prayer room, and the leader(?), Garrett, got things rolling. We asked God to show us what He wanted us to see: names of people, descriptions of people, places, illnesses, and anything else, and wrote everything down that came to mind. Then we compared lists to see if anyone had matching items, separated into two groups, and went to the places we had written down.

Sound silly yet? Well, God did awesome things with this fun little thing.

Among other things, Garrett had written "big wooden doors," I had "across the street," and Justin wrote "MSU Credit Union." Justin was the only one of us who knew that the place he had written down was across the street and had big wooden doors. Ha. The three of us made our own group and went over, looking for people who might match anything on our lists. As we walked around upstairs, Justin approached a fellow who matched a few things he had written, and we followed. He was in a small study group with two others. As it turned out, the guy said he was a Christian, and one of the other students with him was one of the names on Justin's list, as well. We came to find out that this other student was an atheist, and ended up having a really great talk with him about God's love, Christian stewardship, and the Bible. I think all of us (including the atheist) were very surprised to walk away very happy we had talked.

The same student who said he was an atheist also had a problem with his eye which we all prayed for, but didn't see any healing with it at the time. However, Garrett did got a sort of vision from God and saw what it was like to see out of the student's injured eye, and the student confirmed that was indeed what he normally sees. Crazy! I think God is going to move in his heart through all this.

So, with this silly little game we were playing with God (yes, I would call it that; God is our Father, and He does enjoy playing with His children), we got to encourage a few people and even be encouraged by them in return. God was there the whole time, as He always is.

I believe this happens pretty much every Sunday afternoon from 2pm to 4pm. Tomorrow night, they have a big prayer meeting which I'll also be attending. The people I met know God more than I do, and they have joy overflowing, which is pretty hard to find among Christians now. God has already shown a lot to Justin this week when he spent time with them. I think I'll give it a shot and see what God has in store.

Peace.

Halloween!

So, I know I'm a little old for trick-or-treating...but I got to go with my pastor and his daughter today for the first time...in a long time.

Besides the obvious joy of collecting candy with a little kid, today has been a great day. I went to an interview for a security company and ended up getting offered a job on the spot! Then, my mom took me out to lunch and bought me a chainsaw...for which I will be paying her back with this job, haha.

I had been getting pretty discouraged about not having a job, but God is good, and He has shown me that this week. Today he showed (reminded, really) me a few things in 1 Corinthians chapter seven. He reminded me that He has been "acting with great boldness toward me," like He told me on the way back from Colorado. It was good to be reminded of that, since I had been losing sight of it. In verse six, God also reminded me that He "comforts the downcast," which is how I've been feeling for a little while now because of my job situation. God has comforted me a lot today. He is so good.

Now, here's a picture of my costume (no beard...gotta shave for job interviews!):

Peace.

Westward 2012, debrief

So, this trip to Colorado has officially changed my life. It would take an extremely long post to explain everything and I've already talked about some of it, so I'll briefly go through a few more things God showed me.

Now I know for a fact that God wants me in Colorado, and is going to get me there. All week long, Godly people were approaching me and telling me God has something big in store for me out there. On the last day, one of the teachers at Charis Bible College (someone who I had only just met and did not know my story at all) prayed over me and said, "This week God has given you many divine appointments," and, "God is opening doors for you which no man can shut." Wow...and this at the end of a week full of both of those happening nearly every day.

During the week, God not only encouraged me, but also convicted me. Since last winter I have been getting into drinking despite knowing my bad family history with alcohol. Earlier this summer God let me know it wasn't a good idea and that I shouldn't take part in something that has hurt my family so much already...but I ended up ignoring this after a while. This week God brought back the same point He already made and said it with such force that I've been totally freed from it; not that I was being controlled by it, but rather freed from following that path at all. My roommate Justin's jaw dropped last night when I came home and dumped half a bottle of Jager down the drain. Both of my roommates are excited about it and are very supportive of God doing this in my life, which is great. Today I told my mom about all this so that I wouldn't have to keep it from her anymore. Needless to say, she's also really happy about it, haha.

On the bus coming home, I opened my Bible to the book of II Corinthians. I was looking specifically for the passage about Godly grief in chapter seven, but God took me elsewhere. After I didn't find what I was looking for in those words, I glanced over verse four of chapter seven:

"I am acting with great boldness toward you; I have great pride in you; I am filled with comfort. In all our affliction, I am overflowing with joy."

This is Paul talking to the church in Corinth, but when I read it again, God spoke to me:

"Casey, I am acting with great boldness toward you, and I have great pride in you."

I was immediately comforted and started crying (to myself, of course...don't want to embarrass myself on the bus). Those words kept me going the entire trip home, even though I could hardly handle them.

God has definitely renewed me this week. I love what He's doing in me. I have a new desire to search His Word and a newfound trust in the power of the Holy Spirit in me.

Last night when I was thinking about these things, a verse popped into my head which I had heard many times, but which I now think I had gotten all wrong up until now.

"Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall. No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." I Corinthians 10:12-13

I used to think this was saying, "You can fight through every temptation. God gives you some way out in each situation; you just have to buckle down, hand on, and push through it." No. This is all about letting God take control. It doesn't say "a" way of escape, it says "the" way of escape. That way of escape is the Holy Spirit in you. Defeating temptation is not a matter of trying to use God's strength and just getting over it; it's allowing the Holy Spirit to take control and letting the temptation die as you look to Jesus' sacrifice and the freedom God has given you through it.

That seems to be all for now. I'm really excited to see when God will open the door fully so I can take one of the biggest steps of my entire life.

Peace.

Weird joy post

So, I've been doing some fun fiction reading lately...like old-school-type fiction. One of the books I just finished was "Sir Gawain and the Green Knight," and the other, which I just finished today, was "The Hobbit." I noticed a very interesting difference between the attitudes of people "in those days" versus the attitudes of people in America today. In "Gawain," a Middle English poem, everyone seemed to be rejoicing constantly about life and love, were very welcoming toward strangers, and held honour, virtue, and personal piety in high esteem. Of course the story is a romance, so it's only natural that the world seems a better place. However, even in Tolkien's "The Hobbit" this spirit of mirth and celebration was captured well, as the traveling heroes in the story were given warm welcomes in most places, long stays and magnificent send-offs. In his parting words, one of the heroes says, "If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world."

When hard times came, the characters in these stories buckled down, prepared for the worst, and stayed loyal to their friends and personal convictions. When the hard times were over, the transition usually seemed overly dramatic: celebrating, much joy and cheer, and almost always songs. The people coming out of the hardships had reason to rejoice, so they did. It seems natural, doesn't it?

Maybe it's just me, but I feel that we have a whole lot of reasons to celebrate nowadays, yet most people don't seem to think so. Our lives are pretty cushy here in America, and when they get a little less cushy than usual...OMG THE WORLD IS FALLING APART. I know I'm guilty of thinking this way, at least. Really, when things get a little difficult, it might do us better to realise that such is life, and it's blessings and difficulties both are gifts.

Christians in particular have reason to be joyful in life...ALONG with being told that we pretty much are REQUIRED to be joyful, haha. We've been saved from an eternity away from God...so why would we not rejoice all the time? Why should a boring job we don't like be enough to bog down our spirits? Why should some financial hardships make us feel like we're not going to make it?

Some better questions, though: Why do we forget God when these troubles are over? Why do we ask for God's help in all these things, then become complacent when He pulls us through? Should we not rather be celebrating His goodness instead of saying, "Oh, things are better now. FINALLY." We act like it's our right to have happy, easy lives...so when things go "back to normal," there is a distinct lack of celebration. Our lives are just "okay" unless something absolutely FANTASTIC is going on, then things are great! While nothing particularly special is happening, though, we tend to think life is pretty lame. We get bored and try to find something to do that excites our imaginations...all while angels and saints in heaven are rejoicing for eternity because of God's mercy and love. We have the same reasons to be excited as they do. If we decided to be more grateful for what we've been given, maybe we would see more clearly what it means to be joyful in every circumstance.

Go be thankful for what God has given you here on earth and in eternity to come. Live as those whose lives have been truly saved...because that is exactly what has happened.

Give someone a reason to ask you why you're so joyful.

Peace.

The Stoic Christian

So, I recently read about G.K. Chesterton in one of my textbooks, and I was thoroughly impressed with the man. He was a journalist, essayist, debater, and and general learner and reader who loved God and people deeply. He has long been remembered for his intelligence and supreme wit. Opponents who would debate him often went away as his friends because of his charisma and seemingly endless joy about life.

The author of the book said we need more Chestertons in Christianity today, and I totally agree. I often try to stifle my emotions in order to seem more "stable" or "normal," and I think I sometimes come across as someone who just doesn't have any fun. I sometimes find myself in the mindset that I have to control my every emotion in order to be a good Christian, which is not true.

I was reading Luke 18 today. In this chapter, Jesus tells the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector in the temple together. When He gets to the part about the tax collector beating his chest and crying out to God, I imagined Jesus going through this same motion in telling the parable. After the parable, Luke says many people were bringing infants and children to Jesus. I had a thought during this. I often think of Jesus having a stoic personality who is quiet and sombre most of the time. Why? Thinking about it more, I bet Jesus was a pretty charismatic teacher. I bet He got into the parables He told, laughed a lot, and used the rhetoric of his time.

Just a quick thought, but it's a really nice perspective.

Peace.