Thanksgiving Break

So, here we are, enjoying a time of rest and fellowship with those we love. Thanksgiving Break is wonderful.

As unforgiveably cliche as that statement was, it's pretty true for me. This is one of the few times of year that I can spend a significant amount of time with a bunch of relatives on both sides of my family. I am the only link between my mom and dad's respective sides of the family because of a big mess from almost two decades ago, so two Thanksgiving dinners are in store for me each Thanksgiving Day. Sooo good.

I wish all that was the purpose of this blog, though. Since the summer, I've been wondering why I'm at Spring Arbor now. I'm a Retreat and Camping Ministry major. If that's really the type of career I'm going to be working toward after college, why am I not just interning at camp? Neither of my bosses at Center Lake Bible Camp have a degree like this. They actually got the experience they needed in other ways. One was a Biology major, the other was a construction worker; God prepared them perfectly through these experiences for their present jobs. God has certainly done a lot in, on, and through me during my time at Spring Arbor, and for that, I'm thankful. However, I don't know how much longer I should stay. I feel miserable at school, and at times I can't stand the thought of being there for another year and a half after this year is over. The funny part is, several of the textbooks I have to read for school affirm this feeling in me, and according to what they say, I should probably leave. I was seriously entertaining thoughts on not returning to Spring Arbor; I am committed to a few things at school this year that I didn't think would be wise for me to just back out of, so I came back. Now that it's halfway through this year, my grades are slipping, and I can't seem to fix them. My desire to take classes and be at school at all has sunk into the negative. I'm always worrying about getting the next assignment in, whether or not I'll be able to keep a scholarship for next semester, and now the Michigan "Promise" Scholarship has fallen through for me and a bunch of others...

Should I just get over all this after the schoolyear's over and press on, or should I do something else? I'm not the only one who feels like staying at school might not be what God wants us to do; I hear stories like this all the time, and many from Spring Arbor. Of course, this isn't the majority, but I do hear from more and more of my friends that they feel similarly.

I would like to move to Grand Rapids with a bunch of my friends, to be honest. I feel really at home there, and when I'm home or at school, I just feel like I'm floating in an ocean, completely directionless. Relient K's song "College Kids" has never felt more applicable. I've also seriously considered leaving school to intern at Center Lake. Seems to be "THE" thing to do for the kids who don't know what they're doing with their life...haha. Anyways, I could use your prayers about this situation, whoever reads this blog. If any of my friends who read this want to talk about this with me...please...don't hesitate. I don't want to make a decision that I will regret later, whatever the decision is, so getting counsel from others is one of my priorities.

Peace.

H1N1: A new perspective

So, today in my Pentateuch class with Dr. Tom, we had a long discussion about holiness, and I would like to highlight some key points which stood out to me.

1. Holiness is contagious.

2. People who are holy are set apart.

3. Holiness changes your being.

4. When the unholy comes in contact with the holy, there are consequences.

Now, let's look at H1N1:

1. It's contagious.

2. People who have it are set apart from everyone else.

3. It changes your physical being.

4. When someone who doesn't have it comes into contact with someone who does, there are consequences.

What's the moral of this blog post? The swine flu is comparable to holiness.

Hope that was worth half a laugh. (<-- Rhyme, teehee.)

Construction Zone #2

Alrighty. So, I was hanging out with some friends yesterday on my birthday, and I learned a few unfortunate things about myself. Ughhh. I try to serve others when I can, but I don't always do that very well, and to top it off, I realized that sometimes I force the service on them. That's not cool. The main thing yesterday was that one of my good friends told me that I make it hard for others to serve me. I know that statement was intended to help me, but I really felt like a jerk when I heard it. They basically said I should stop being stubborn, because some people might be trying to serve me, but they don't know how. I know I can be fairly stubborn sometimes, but I had no idea it was to the point of getting in people's way when they're trying to be cool to me. =[

I guess this is just another way in which God's trying to work on me...but this is a little harder for me to do than other things. I don't really know how to work on this specifically. I guess praying about it would be a good idea...I don't know what else to do.

Exodus attitudes

Hey readers! I was working on an assignment today for my Pentateuch class (Pentateuch = 1st five books of the Bible, fyi), and I came up with an interesting perspective that I've never heard before. This is what I got...check it.

It's interesting how much the Israelites grumbled and rejected God after all they had seen Him do for them in bringing them out of Egypt. They were so focused on the moment and themselves that they completely lost sight of God and His long-term plans for them, even after His continual reminders. It's also interesting to note that although God physically brought them out of Egypt, their mindset hadn't changed from when they were held as slaves. Let me explain further. I think their complaining could be attributed to them being so used to oppressions for such a long time that they couldn't get out of their rebellion-against-authority mindset even while God led them. They went out of their way to continue complaining, even after their original (and legitimate) complaints had been dealt with. I'd like to propose the idea that maybe this was because instead of seeing the differences, they saw the SIMILARITIES between God's authority and Pharaoh's: they both claimed authority over Israel, they both provided what Israel needed for survival (Pharaoh, obviously, less graciously, and more for the purpose of merely keeping them alive enough to work for him), and they both expected Israel to obey their commands, or there would be consequences. However, if this is why they were still complaining, they sure missed the DIFFERENCES between the main purposes of the two "servitudes," as it were: Pharaoh set them apart and lorded over them in order to build up his own people and nation, and didn't care about them at all, as long as they could do the work expected of them; God, however, set them apart and became their Lord in order to build them up AS his own people, His holy nation among the nations, and He most certainly cared for their well-being. He wanted them to become closer to Himself.

My friend Brian came in with a sweet application after hearing this, which I'm stealing and expounding on, haha. Basically, when we ask God to help us in our life situations, and He does, then that's great. We're out of Egypt. However, God doesn't change our mindsets outright. We may still gripe and grumble and lose sight of what God's already done for us if we don't remember to be thankful for it. Take the salvation He's given us, for example. We have no reason to complain about our life situations if we deserved eternal separation from Him in hell, and yet He gave His Son Jesus in our place. No reason at all.

In short: God's changed our situation, but have we changed our attitudes in response to His grace and love?

I think I'm going to use this for a Bible study on my floor soon.

Internet control

Hey readers! I have some time off from homework, so I thought I'd share some thoughts with y'all.

As some of you may know, I deleted my Facebook account this past Tuesday night. Many people have opposed me in this decision, but I'm sticking with it. It was consuming my life...quite literally. It was taking the place of God in my daily routine. Everything I did usually had something to do with it at some point or another. These things, along with the fact that there are plenty of other ways to keep in contact with me/for me to keep in contact with others (including this blog, btw), all contributed to the deletion.

Like I mentioned, I have several friends who have been/are trying to get me to change my mind, but stuff like that usually just strengthens my resolve. Another note: a smallgroup that one of my cousins is involved with at MSU and a Sunday school class at my home church BOTH used this event in their discussions. My cousin said people in her group thought it was really cool, and the class at my church ALL sent me letters together encouraging me to stick with my decision and stay right with God. Holy crap. Despite all the negative, God has been using certain people to really encourage me and make me convinced that I made the right decision. =]

God has been really working on me, as you can see with this post and my last one. I'm pretty pumped. I really want to give up all the crap I'm holding on to, and He's been helping me do that. I guess that's been the main thing lately. Hope y'all have a good night!

Encouragement

Things have been building up lately: my dislike of school, my irritability, my frustration with myself, my desire to get closer to God (ironically, after the first three), and my stress with homework, which I'm making worse even now by writing this post...but oh well.

Even through my failure to keep up my end of a healthy relationship with God, He still has been teaching me various lessons lately. Time management would be one, being the one issue which has been interfering most with my relationship with Him. I'm really good at procrastinating and distracting myself from what needs to be done, which has been affecting pretty much everything in my life in some way or another.

One of the biggest things God has been weighing on me about lately is my attitude toward others. I've come to the realization that I am not a very encouraging person. I mean, I can be when I feel like I really need to be, but that's really not very often, and my language in general is mostly not good for building people up. I intend to change that, with God's help. I've already set a goal to encourage a set number of people this week, but I would like to not even worry about the number and just do it. Are we not supposed to be doing so anyway? Fail. I've been doing some serious self-analyzing lately, and my life is not matching up to what it should look like if I were truly letting Jesus live through me. Sigh. I have so much to say, but only a few words to articulate it with. I'm looking forward to, and yet terrified of, whatever God's will is for my life.

If it seems like my thoughts are jumping around, I'm sorry. Our chaplain, Ron Kopicko, spoke at Deeper tonight, and it really affected me. I realized how many people on this campus are hurting and need love, and how calloused I've become to that fact. I've been so focused on myself lately, even though I didn't realize it, that I've blinded myself to others' needs.

I know this is all pretty scatterbrained, but that's the way I feel right now. I just needed to write some of it out. Thanks for reading.

Sarcasm?

I've had some thoughts like this floating around my head for a while, and just today I gave it some more thought. Sarcasm. That one thing we're all so good at, and love using so often. Also something that I feel should be addressed.

My main point: Hebrews 12:14 - "Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord." I admittedly use some heavy sarcasm with my friends in regular conversation; however, the difference I want to distinguish here is between sarcastically joking around with friends and using sarcasm in a provocatory, argumentative manner. This might seem like a pointless note to those reading it, but after reading a facebook note recently written by a friend, and watching the responding believers (people whom I respect, no less) try to destroy each other with sarcastic comments over whether or not their respective opinions were Biblical, I think it important to offer up a reminder. Sarcasm is fine when you're having fun with friends who can handle it; this is not what was happening, though. The sarcasm I am opposing is that which is meant to tear down others, to build up one's own opinion, and which causes strife among the Church. It's not about whether or not your opinion is right...seriously. You may very well be correct, but that doesn't give you the right to force people into your way of thinking by tearing them apart with logic. 1 Peter 3:8-11 - "Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. For 'Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it.'" Trying to destroy someone else's opinion in order to prove that you are correct is the opposite of having a humble mind. Using sarcasm to this end is not striving after peace or holiness. Its sole purpose is to make someone feel guilty or inferior, which is NOT what we have been called to do.

In the end, though, this is my opinion. I've been throwing around Scripture just like everyone else who wants to prove a point. If you call me a hypocrite for this, I accept the title, haha. After that, though, let's both consider how we can better submit our lives to Christ by living out Hebrews 12:14.

Peace.